By Any Other Name

From: Merian Vidumarvis (Port Security)
To: All Security Personnel
Subject: Bribery (Security Directive 7124-33)

With reference to the assortment of rntrugg vessels docking here recently, their crewers’ misdemeanor-worthy behavior while docked, and their persistent interpretation of fines assessed and levied per summary judgment procedure as bribes:

Let them.

Various parts of our department and more diplomatic ones have been trying to explain the difference between a fine and a bribe to them for over a year now, and haven’t succeeded yet. The diplomats may yet succeed in figuring out a way past whatever unique cultural nuance or quirk of linguistic corpus makes this as incomprehensible a concept as it seems to be for them, but for now, go with it.

As long as justice gets paid at Curial rates, which it is, and the externality is properly internalized with regard to effects on their subsequent behavior, which it seems to be, my judgment is that they can call it what they like. Should this matter come up in any future dispute or administrative proceeding, refer it to my office under Security Directive 7124-33.

– mv/PS

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